I had struggled with this class from Day One—no, make that Day Two. On Day One, the class was missing five students, but I blithely introduced the art curriculum that we would cover and moved on to the first drawing. Things went very well and I was thrilled to have such a curious and engaged bunch of students. Then came Day Two.
The group of five arrived in class ten minutes late. I had already started the class on a drawing exercise that would require extreme concentration and a quiet atmosphere. H. was in the lead loudly discussing her sexual exploits. B. was recounting her day in court, while K., E. and A. listened with rapt attention. As they entered the room I said good morning- they ignored me. “What are we supposed to do?” questioned E. “SHHH” I replied about to give them directions. “She F-ing asked you a question” H. screamed. “O.K.” I said. “Please sit down and draw only the outside line of the object on the paper at your table.” “The outside line?” questioned A. “There isn’t any line around the stupid leaf,” stated B. loudly. “Listen folks,” I began- “No YOU listen,” H. yelled- “We didn’t sign up for this F-ing class and we don’t need to listen to you!”
It didn’t get any better after that day. When the five were absent, the class made progress. When they were in attendance it was a contentious group and not one I looked forward to teaching. I was not making connections or building relationships with these students and research shows that relationships are one of the most important elements necessary for students to succeed.
One day as I was greeting my class, a teacher stopped to discuss a project with me, and delayed my entrance to the classroom by about two minutes. When I stepped into the room, H. was standing up front showing my sketchbook to the class. B. said- “H. is the teacher today!” My first reaction was- “uh oh.” Luckily I went with my second reaction- “Why not?” I said. “Go ahead H. show us “your” book.” “Uh, OK- here’s my eagle and on this page is my horse and on this page” she stopped. She had arrived at a poem I had written during a time of duress in my life. I encouraged her- “Go ahead H. read it.” She began- “Mothers hope for their children. . .” The silence in the classroom was palpable. H. had their undivided attention. She read on and shared two other poignant poems. The class was totally agog. I stepped toward the front of the room– H. handed me my sketchbook and went to her seat quietly.
It seems that I had finally “connected” to this class through no fault of my own. Attitudes didn’t magically change that day, but general behavior was better and the class was more respectful. Building relationships doesn’t happen in one day. It takes time and openness on both sides to create a space for that to happen. H. had taught me an important lesson. In order to create relationships with troubled students, it’s important that they understand that you are human too. It’s O.K. for kids to know that you have been through troubled times of your own.
As school began this year, I greeted my students and shared a poem. I asked them some questions about themselves and I let them ask questions about me. Yes, I will teach art curriculum, but first I will work on developing the foundation for the relationships they truly need.
Pamelia Valentine is a guest blogger and teacher in the Shelton School District.
Previous Blogs:
I WILL know what you did last summer
Being a Teacher Leader--Within, Across and Beyond